Is a rivalry between two vegetarians still called a “beef”??
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Today’s Thought
“I was perfectly content before I was born, and I think of death as the same state. What I am grateful for is the gift of intelligence, and for life, love, wonder, and laughter. You can’t say it wasn’t interesting. My lifetime’s memories are what I have brought home from the trip.” – Roger Ebert
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Me: “It’s not about how many times you fall, it’s about how many times you get back up.”
Cop: “That’s not how field sobriety tests work.”
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As you get older, you’ve got to stay positive.
For example, the other day I fell down the stairs.
Instead of getting upset, I just thought, “Wow, that’s the fastest I’ve moved in years!”
Guess who got a lot done today??
Well, not me, but congrats to someone out there…
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I exercised once, but found out I was allergic to it!
My skin flushed and my heart raced and I got sweaty and short of breath!
Boy, that was a close call!!
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My wife was going through her wardrobe. She exclaimed, “Look at this! It still fits me after 25 years!”
I looked up and said, “It’s a scarf.”
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Weather (or Not)
Quotable “Youngsterisms” from Kids about the Weather
“A hurricane is a breeze of a bigly size.”
“A monsoon is a French gentleman.”
“A blizzard is when it snows sideways.”
“The wind is like the air, only pushier.”
“Clouds are high flying fogs.”
“Rain is saved up in cloud banks.”
“Thunder is a rich source of loudness.”
“Rainbows are just to look at, not to really understand.”
“Humidity is the experience of looking for air and finding water.”
“Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound.”
“Clouds just keep circling the earth around and around. And around. There is not much else to do.”
“South America has cold summers and hot winters, but somehow they still manage.”
“Rain is often known as soft water, oppositely known as hail.”
“We keep track of the humidity in the air so we won’t drown when we breathe.”
“I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.”
“It is so hot in some places that the people there have to live in other places.”
“Water vapor gets together in a cloud. When it is big enough to be called a drop, it does.”
“You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don’t hear it, you got hit, so never mind.”