I love pressing F5. It’s so refreshing.
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If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
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TODAY’S THOUGHTS
“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” – e. e. cummings
[Editor: Hey, that’s why you’ve got TIDBITS, so at least one day a week isn’t wasted. Below are some more quotes about laughter.]
“She knew what all smart women knew: Laughter made you live better and longer.” – Gail Parent
“Laughter is the closest distance between two people.” – Victor Borge
“Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.” – Red Skelton
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The priest was preparing a dying man for his voyage into the great beyond.
Whispering firmly, the priest said, “Denounce the devil! Let him know how little you think of his evil!”
The dying man said nothing.
The priest repeated his order.
Still the dying man said nothing.
The priest asked, “Why do you refuse to denounce the devil and his evil?”
The dying man said, “Until I know where I’m heading, I don’t think I ought to aggravate anybody.”
FEATURED VIDEO
When I’m feeling down, I like to whistle.
It makes the neighbor’s dog run to the end of his chain and choke himself.
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QUOTABLE
“You’d be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.” – Dolly Parton
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[Our last two items today were featured in the original run of TIDBITS. They both are from issue #797, which was sent on 12/22/2003.]
Just Wondering…
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
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At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?”
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
“Do you understand that what matters is that we play together as a team?”
The little boy nodded yes.
“So,” the coach continued, “when a strike is called, or you’re out at first, you don’t argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?”
Again the little boy nodded.
“Good,” said the coach. “Now go over there and explain it to your parents.”
