An old man named Sam was a witness in a burglary case.
The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?”
“Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.”
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An old man named Sam was a witness in a burglary case.
The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?”
“Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.”
[A version of this first one was featured during our first run of TIDBITS and appeared in issue #881 in June 2004. I’ve edited and updated it for use in this issue.]
A woman was walking along a beach when she stumbled over a bottle, knocking the cork out. Out popped a genie. The woman got very excited and said, “Oh goodie! I get three wishes, right?”
“No ma’am,” replied the genie. “Things are really bad in the genie economy, so today you can only get one wish.”
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A rich man was trying to find his daughter a birthday gift when he saw a poor man with a beautiful white horse. He told the man that he would give him $500 for the horse.
The poor man replied, “I don’t know mister, it don’t look so good,” and walked away.
Sam went to the doctor to find out about his recent tests.
“It’s really bad, I’m afraid,” said his doctor. “You’ve got a disease so new that it hasn’t even been given a name yet — we just call it ‘Blue 56.’
“The only certain thing,” continued the doctor in hushed tones, “is that you don’t have much more than three days to live.”