TIDBITS 1045

I’d love to attend the assertiveness training, but I’d better check with my wife first.
______

The good-natured boss was finally compelled to call Sam into his office.

“It has not escaped my attention,” he pointed out, “that every time there’s a home game at the stadium, you have to take your aunt to the doctor.”

“You know… you’re right, sir,” exclaimed Smith, “I didn’t realize it. You don’t suppose she’s faking, do you?”
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 2017 Christmas Special

How is Christmas like a day at your job?

You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit!
______

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1044

My wife just found out the hard way that I replaced our bed with a trampoline.

She really hit the ceiling.
______

But I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference!!
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1043

My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.

Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.
______

A young businessman had just started his own firm. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.

He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, “Can I help you?”

The man replied, “Yeah, I’ve come to activate your phone lines.”
______

Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1042

Just because nobody complains doesn’t mean all parachutes are perfect.
______

‘Tis better to keep quiet and be thought a fool,
than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS Photo-Cartoons About Trump

Here are photo-cartoons I’ve created for various issues of my weekly TIDBITS humor newsletter that poke a little gentle fun at our current Commander in Chief, including some that have something else as a primary topic.

Click any to bring up a larger image.


From TIDBITS 1019, June 11th, 2017:

Continue reading

Posted in Photo-Cartoons | 2 Comments

TIDBITS 1041

If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip!
______

I hope the kids never figure out why I say “Oooops!” so often when I vacuum their rooms.
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1040

The sole purpose of a child’s middle name is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble!
______

Always remember that a penny saved… is a government oversight!
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1039

I love pressing F5. It’s so refreshing.
______

If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
______

Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment

TIDBITS 1038

When I die, I want my tombstone to be a WiFi hotspot.

That way people will visit more often.
______

Have you heard about the new Korean cookbook?

It’s called, “101 Ways to WOK Your Dog.”
______
Continue reading

Posted in TIDBITS | Leave a comment