TIDBITS 1027

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!
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Tech-savvy man to his aged father: “I don’t think you even know what a hard drive is.”

Aged father: “I’ve driven across the country with your mother and you kids. I know what a hard drive is.”
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TIDBITS 1026

Today I gave my dead batteries away.

Free of charge!
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I’ve just opened a new restaurant called Karma.

There’s no menu, we just give you what you deserve.
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Photo-Cartoons about Trent and TIDBITS

Here are photo-cartoons I’ve created for various issues of my weekly TIDBITS humor newsletter that deal with the the publication itself and my attempts to get people to sign up for it or read it.

Along the way we visit classic movies, famous works of art, and scenes from history (and just for fun, I have included myself in many of the cartoons).

Click any to bring up a larger image.


From TIDBITS 1025, July 23rd, 2017:

TIDBITS Is One Small Step for Man

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TIDBITS Photo-Cartoons About Trump

Here are photo-cartoons I’ve created for various issues of my weekly TIDBITS humor newsletter that poke a little gentle fun at our current Commander in Chief, including some that have something else as a primary topic.

Click any to bring up a larger image.


From TIDBITS 1019, June 11th, 2017:

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TIDBITS 1025

Do you ever notice that when you’re driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
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I may be in trouble. I recently visited a local haunted house, and I got scared half to death… twice!
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TIDBITS 1024

“I am going bananas!”

That’s what I say to my bananas each morning before I leave the house.
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It’s been scientifically proven that too many birthdays can kill you!
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TIDBITS 1023

A police recruit was asked during the exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?”

He replied, “Call for backup!”
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If I had 50 cents for every math exam I failed, I’d have $6.30 by now.
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TIDBITS 1022

A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at a fast food restaurant. He noticed that they had ordered one meal and an extra drink cup.

As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and set that in front of his wife.

The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap.
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TIDBITS 1021

An old man named Sam was a witness in a burglary case.

The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?”

“Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.”

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TIDBITS 1020

[A version of this first one was featured during our first run of TIDBITS and appeared in issue #881 in June 2004. I’ve edited and updated it for use in this issue.]

A woman was walking along a beach when she stumbled over a bottle, knocking the cork out. Out popped a genie. The woman got very excited and said, “Oh goodie! I get three wishes, right?”

“No ma’am,” replied the genie. “Things are really bad in the genie economy, so today you can only get one wish.”
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